It is easy to speak honestly with your spouse when it is about something good, trivial or humorous. Communication becomes an issue when you have to tell them something they probably don’t want to hear.
It becomes even harder when you are advising them against a particular decision. Everyone has the right to make their own choices but when you have enough foresight to know that what they are attempting to do might cost them in the future, you don’t just sit back and watch them do it.
So, here are 5 tips that can help you to get your message and possibly influence their choice.
1. Speak kindly
When you are speaking to your spouse about something you think they are doing wrong, remember to speak kindly. Speaking kindly does not mean that you would sugarcoat the facts, it only means that you use a friendly tone of voice that would make them more inclined to listen to you.
The goal is for them to take what you are saying into consideration and not to start a fight. Shouting will get you nowhere with them.
2. Offer an alternative
If you know a better choice that they can make, you can offer it to them as an alternative. This would make them realise that you are not just criticizing their decision for the sake of it. It would also open their eyes to the fact that there are other better choices out there.
3. Show them the possible repercussions
If what they are about to do will have legal repercussions, make sure that you highlight this in your discussion with them. Sometimes people do not consider the legal aspects of their choices and what could happen if they go along with it.
4. It is still their choice to make
At the end of the day, it is still their life and they get to choose what to do with it. Watching someone you love making a poor choice can be a hurtful thing to experience but everyone is entitled to their choice. If you are a spiritual person, you can pray for them and hope for the best.
5. Remember that you are doing it from a place of love
This links with all the points above. Remember not to be judgemental. Everyone at some point has made a poor choice and have learnt and grown from it, including you. So remember that nobody’s life is perfect and poor choices help us to be wiser in the future.