Sex sex sex! That’s the topic breaking through ethers of the romantic atmosphere across the globe.
In all ramifications, it can be drawn that the act of Sexual intercourse can indeed change a relationship for good; either to the right direction or otherwise.
The bond that Sex creates in relationships shouldn’t be overlooked because even as it could strengthen relationships, it could keep you emotionally attached to the wrong person.
WAITING till after marriage for sex seems religiously appealing at all fronts, and to be honest with you it really is a beautiful thing to behold. However, let us not pretend to be unaware of the numerous disadvantages it holds. (few of which will be treated here)
Thus, before taking a “purity pledge” (i.e. No sex till marriage), let us be realistic at the following levels:
1.) Your Future Sexual Satisfaction is not guaranteed:
This is the major disadvantage of not having sex with your partner till after marriage.
It is true marriage isn’t entirely about sex but we can’t deny the fact that sexual intimacy makes up a huge part of marriages.
When you haven’t had sex with your mate before walking down the aisle, your partner’s sexual capability is entirely subjected to guess work which is really a huge risk and if your guess turns out wrong, it most often than not leads to…..
We’re humans. It is in our nature to diversify when our long term investments yield a loss.
Oh yes, that’s the word, it’s a big loss! Imagine having spent two decades (or more) of your life waiting for your wedding night to have that long envisaged pleasure of intimacy only to be met with an ill-performing partner. It’s a huge loss!
At this point, one party or both begin looking for alternative means to attain that long yearned satisfaction. At first, it starts with masturbating and porn addiction, and when it gets out of hand, infidelity sets in.
Body no be firewood you know.
3.) Risk of Impotence:
There’s absolutely nothing worse than discovering that you’ve been entangled to a partner that’ll never be able to procreate with you till death do you both part.
What a nightmare that is!
No wonder some people choose to get married only when the wife gets pregnant.
I even recall a neighbour back in Abuja who had an impotent husband. She had to have children with his relations and name them after him just to keep the marriage strong.
Some love strong sha!
4.) Sexual Chemistry:
Supposing everything goes fine and both partners are fit, capable and fertile, they will most definitely be one thing missing: Sexual Chemistry.
For couples who have had each other before walking down the aisle, pleasing each other won’t really be difficult because they already know where ticks and how to get into each other’s cloud nine. That’s the understanding they took time to build. Mind you, everyone’s different. That which works for Obi may piss Alhaji off.
It’s really hard getting married to someone you don’t fully understand and some situations come up where one partner wants MouthAction and the other detests it, or where one partner seeks to try out other positions and the other won’t just get any of it.
These could lead to both insatisfaction and infidelity which aren’t really good for a lifetime bond.
So, guys, that’s it.
I’m not encouraging you to lose your “sexual purity”, I’m rather highlighting the disadvantages of what you’re getting yourself into and being real about it.
Please don’t get me wrong, your purity pledge could come out as a tremendous success (which would be awesome) but assuming you find yourself in any of the situations stated above, know it’s because of the decision you took.
Wish you well.